When I think of honesty, not the word ‘honesty’, but honesty the way I live it, I kinda get the heebie jeebies. Whenever I am wavering on the edge of truth, truth that isn’t easy, truth that doesn’t serve me in some way, a laser of light cuts through any crap that I might be hiding behind and, like the curtain yanked abruptly aside revealing the man behind the curtain in the Wizard of Oz, I stand, shaking, under the naked light bulb of truth.
Of course, I, like you, have always known the truth. But through years of untruths fed to me and years of manipulating the truth to suit my own needs, I shudder at my own inability to be truthful, even to myself.
Mostly to myself.
Honesty sometimes seems to be a slippery concept. Some people live their lives balanced on a beach ball, shifting it slightly this way or that till their truth accommodates the situation. Sometimes we omit certain segments of a story to refrain from an out and out lie or we avoid speaking at all, justifying to ourselves, at least, that no lie was committed. Is the halo still firmly in place?
But more sadly than the above examples of human dishonesty, is that we don’t even know, or if we do, we rarely live, the absolute truth about ourselves. And that is that we are divinely created, divinely protected and divinely cherished. And we don’t have to do anything to obtain this love. No lie is required. There is no need to shift on the beach ball to conform to another’s (or our own) expectations.
Lying to ourselves and others keeps us shackled. Opening our arms and hearts wide open and speaking our truth, with kindness and compassion, of course, is freedom unlimited.
To me, this is liberating!
Wednesday, December 14, 2011
Saturday, December 10, 2011
Life is Easy
My dear friend, Janet, and I were discussing life and all its challenges today. We decided life does not have to be so hard. We may have to peel off some layers of, well, I don’t know a nicer way to say it, peel off some layers of crap to create an easier life, but life itself just does not need to be so hard. It is true, of course, that we experience difficulties as we travel life’s road, but I don’t believe that means life ITSELF must be hard. If we adopt an attitude that it is, and where I work many people that end up in front of me do believe life is truly hard, then everything becomes hard. Getting stuck in traffic becomes hard. Now if there is someone who is having a heart attack or bleeding to death in your car and you become stuck in traffic, then yes, life is hard in that moment but let’s face it…how often does that happen…unless you’re an ambulance driver?
Most things that first appear to be difficult can be knocked down a notch or two by infusing the situation with a little bit of humor. Or on a more philosophical note, ask yourself the question, “What is mine to do right now in this moment.” This question allows you to get perspective on the issue and to re-define your integrity and re-establish your boundaries.
As my regular readers know by now, I connect very deeply with nature. While sitting at the lake this morning, I was reminded of the beauty and balance in the unhurried, unrushed life in which all of nature abides. There is no such thing as time or acquisitions or life’s difficulties in the natural world. Life just is. Watch birds sometime. They don’t stress. Everything just IS and they move through their lifespans effortlessly.
Today did hold a measure of stress, strain and struggle for me but I discovered anew that life does not have to be hard. I have it within my power to flow WITH life and not to resist it. Non-resistance is the key to experiencing an easier…no, no, not necessarily easier life, as in no challenges…but an easier viewpoint. Non-resistance coupled with the choice to breathe in the light and love of the moment, rather than breathe in the darkness and difficulty, creates an easier energy. An easier way TO BE.
As I write this, I am sitting down at the lake again. The day is drawing to a close. It’s quite windy and therefore chilly. I have a blanket wrapped around me. A man paces back and forth a short distance from where I sit. A mother, talking on her cell phone, walks with her young daughter near the water’s edge. A small houseboat, struggling against the wind, motors toward its mooring. The wildlife is bedding down for the night.
So is the sun.
So must I. Easily.
Most things that first appear to be difficult can be knocked down a notch or two by infusing the situation with a little bit of humor. Or on a more philosophical note, ask yourself the question, “What is mine to do right now in this moment.” This question allows you to get perspective on the issue and to re-define your integrity and re-establish your boundaries.
As my regular readers know by now, I connect very deeply with nature. While sitting at the lake this morning, I was reminded of the beauty and balance in the unhurried, unrushed life in which all of nature abides. There is no such thing as time or acquisitions or life’s difficulties in the natural world. Life just is. Watch birds sometime. They don’t stress. Everything just IS and they move through their lifespans effortlessly.
Today did hold a measure of stress, strain and struggle for me but I discovered anew that life does not have to be hard. I have it within my power to flow WITH life and not to resist it. Non-resistance is the key to experiencing an easier…no, no, not necessarily easier life, as in no challenges…but an easier viewpoint. Non-resistance coupled with the choice to breathe in the light and love of the moment, rather than breathe in the darkness and difficulty, creates an easier energy. An easier way TO BE.
As I write this, I am sitting down at the lake again. The day is drawing to a close. It’s quite windy and therefore chilly. I have a blanket wrapped around me. A man paces back and forth a short distance from where I sit. A mother, talking on her cell phone, walks with her young daughter near the water’s edge. A small houseboat, struggling against the wind, motors toward its mooring. The wildlife is bedding down for the night.
So is the sun.
So must I. Easily.
Thursday, December 8, 2011
Living authentically
The question was presented to me recently: “Am I living authentically in this very moment?”
My mind began instantly to do what minds do - think - searching for my definition of authentic to judge and determine if I am. I looked up the word authentic and gave myself a gold star because my definition was nearly identical to Webster’s.
Authentic: not false or copied; genuine, real; reliable; trustworthy.
Within moments that inner voice, the gloom and doom critic, chimed in with all the reasons and all the ways I could not possibly be living authentically; i.e. Thanksgiving cooking would soon commence and butter, eggs and many other non-vegan food ingredients would be used. See how that inner judge is so ready to jump on me.
Is it true that without absolute perfection one cannot live authentically?
This cannot be true. We are perfect spiritual beings, living an often, imperfect human experience. For me, living authentically in this very moment means an awareness of my inherent perfection…a “knowing” that allows me to be consciously aware of this moment. It is not listening to a rehearsal of all the past moments and the judging that accompanies that particular song and dance. Being authentic, not perfect, in this moment means I feel the chilly wind blowing all around me as I sit on the dock, I hear the birds nearby and see the branches move with the wind. I am aware of my breathing.
In this moment I am living authentically.
In this moment I am alive to life.
My mind began instantly to do what minds do - think - searching for my definition of authentic to judge and determine if I am. I looked up the word authentic and gave myself a gold star because my definition was nearly identical to Webster’s.
Authentic: not false or copied; genuine, real; reliable; trustworthy.
Within moments that inner voice, the gloom and doom critic, chimed in with all the reasons and all the ways I could not possibly be living authentically; i.e. Thanksgiving cooking would soon commence and butter, eggs and many other non-vegan food ingredients would be used. See how that inner judge is so ready to jump on me.
Is it true that without absolute perfection one cannot live authentically?
This cannot be true. We are perfect spiritual beings, living an often, imperfect human experience. For me, living authentically in this very moment means an awareness of my inherent perfection…a “knowing” that allows me to be consciously aware of this moment. It is not listening to a rehearsal of all the past moments and the judging that accompanies that particular song and dance. Being authentic, not perfect, in this moment means I feel the chilly wind blowing all around me as I sit on the dock, I hear the birds nearby and see the branches move with the wind. I am aware of my breathing.
In this moment I am living authentically.
In this moment I am alive to life.
Wednesday, December 7, 2011
The Way of the Osprey
It is so fascinating to watch an osprey fish for his breakfast. He will spot a fish from where he is flying high above the water, he folds his wings against his body and then he splashes into the water and catches the fish. Somehow, he is immediately back in the air, holding the fish in his grasp, the fish’s head facing forward, aerodynamically efficient. Then he flies away to find a tree or pole in which to enjoy his meal.
Sometimes, however, the fish is too heavy to lift out of the water. The osprey, rather than release his meal, will hang on tenaciously, even until the weight of the fish pulls the bird under the water, drowning him.
I witnessed an osprey not long ago, struggling thus. He did manage to get airborne enough to reach land safely with his prize but it gave me pause, time to consider and examine all the ways I allow persons or circumstances to nearly drown me before I let go.
For me, it has mostly been romantic relationships, hanging in there long after the funeral dirge, mirroring what appears to be stupidity, on the part of the osprey, but persistence on the part of humans.
How about you? What do you need to let go in order to feel freedom?
Anger and resentment?
Self-criticism and self-judgment?
A job?
Toxic relationships with family, friends or others?
As we prepare to move forward into 2012, is it time to release that which threatens to drown you, pulling you down, down, down?
Like the osprey.
Sometimes, however, the fish is too heavy to lift out of the water. The osprey, rather than release his meal, will hang on tenaciously, even until the weight of the fish pulls the bird under the water, drowning him.
I witnessed an osprey not long ago, struggling thus. He did manage to get airborne enough to reach land safely with his prize but it gave me pause, time to consider and examine all the ways I allow persons or circumstances to nearly drown me before I let go.
For me, it has mostly been romantic relationships, hanging in there long after the funeral dirge, mirroring what appears to be stupidity, on the part of the osprey, but persistence on the part of humans.
How about you? What do you need to let go in order to feel freedom?
Anger and resentment?
Self-criticism and self-judgment?
A job?
Toxic relationships with family, friends or others?
As we prepare to move forward into 2012, is it time to release that which threatens to drown you, pulling you down, down, down?
Like the osprey.
Monday, November 28, 2011
Kindness Matters
I met a young woman the other day who had some serious issues, some of which could possibly result in her arrest. She was so sweet and so open and vulnerable about her situation; I couldn’t help but be gentle and compassionate toward her, though all of her “stuff” was ultimately her responsibility.
At the end of our interaction she was very grateful. She ended our conversation by telling me that I was pretty. What a nice thing to say and, of course, I thanked her. She said, “If we complimented each other more, the world would be a nicer place.”
How true, how true.
We don’t get too much in the line of compliments after about the age of 2 or 3 years old. The world becomes a harsh, mean place where we dole out compliments as if they physically hurt us to do so. How can it harm us to tell someone they have great hair or a beautiful smile? Do we really believe the myth “You’ll get a big head!” if we compliment someone too much? Is that why we become so stingy giving them?
Well, we can change that one person at a time!
A gentleman came to me, needing help with his documents. He had the most handsome nose, very chiseled and Roman looking. I told him so. The next day he came back to complete the transaction and requested me. He told me it was because I complimented his nose and that made him feel good.
Just think…something so very simple can be so very profound.
At the end of our interaction she was very grateful. She ended our conversation by telling me that I was pretty. What a nice thing to say and, of course, I thanked her. She said, “If we complimented each other more, the world would be a nicer place.”
How true, how true.
We don’t get too much in the line of compliments after about the age of 2 or 3 years old. The world becomes a harsh, mean place where we dole out compliments as if they physically hurt us to do so. How can it harm us to tell someone they have great hair or a beautiful smile? Do we really believe the myth “You’ll get a big head!” if we compliment someone too much? Is that why we become so stingy giving them?
Well, we can change that one person at a time!
A gentleman came to me, needing help with his documents. He had the most handsome nose, very chiseled and Roman looking. I told him so. The next day he came back to complete the transaction and requested me. He told me it was because I complimented his nose and that made him feel good.
Just think…something so very simple can be so very profound.
Wednesday, November 23, 2011
Connected...Again
I had a few moments this morning when I felt so completely connected and full of love for everybody…and it happened in the most unlikely of all places, 7-11. It was quite early in the morning, around 5:15, and I was on my way to a rare, but deeply appreciated, pet sit.
When I walked into 7-11 to get a cup of coffee, my mental state was one of self-judgment. My inner critic was hot on the trail of beating me up…again. The energy within the store was surprisingly warm, a real sense of community. Everyone seemed to know each other; the solitary cashier and a police officer chatted convivially; other shoppers greeted each other with familiarity. I felt like I’d crashed a family reunion wherein everyone liked each other. It was nice and once again I felt connected…this time to humans.
I drove away feeling much less like a crabby island and more like a member of a happy village.
When I walked into 7-11 to get a cup of coffee, my mental state was one of self-judgment. My inner critic was hot on the trail of beating me up…again. The energy within the store was surprisingly warm, a real sense of community. Everyone seemed to know each other; the solitary cashier and a police officer chatted convivially; other shoppers greeted each other with familiarity. I felt like I’d crashed a family reunion wherein everyone liked each other. It was nice and once again I felt connected…this time to humans.
I drove away feeling much less like a crabby island and more like a member of a happy village.
Sunday, November 20, 2011
Connection
This morning I drove down to my beautiful and beloved lake. Before I even turned off the engine, I noticed an Ahinga (a Florida water bird) sitting on the dock – the same one who had been there a few days earlier. When I had first spotted him, he appeared to have a long worm or a long piece of intestine in his beak. As I watched him, however, it looked like he was trying to scrape something off his beak rather than eat the something. Looking more closely, I thought what I saw was a piece of rope about 4 inches long. Silently I swore at humans who dump nearly everything into the lake, ignorantly creating deadly situations for the resident wildlife. There was nothing I could do, so off to work I went.
But here he was again, still with that length of ‘something’ hanging from his beak. Now rather than try to scrape it off, he just sat there, burying his head under his wing. He’s starving, I thought to myself, becoming weaker and weaker. My heart was breaking but how could I help him. Maybe I could catch him?
I opened the door to my truck carefully, quietly…he didn’t move. I slipped off my outer flannel shirt…no response. I began approaching him over a distance of about 35 ft, expecting that at any moment he would startle and fly away. Amazingly, he didn’t. When I was about 3 feet from him I thought to myself ‘I’m going to do it.’ Two more steps and I threw my shirt over him and grabbed him! COOL !!! Except he immediately went for my eyes. I held his beak and examined the mess – and what a mess it was.
He did have rope, like clothesline line rope, wrapped and knotted completely around his beak. He was unable to open it enough to even get a drink of water. He would have perished for certain. But I had him now!
I immediately realized that this would be a two person job. I scanned the near empty parking lot until I found someone just emerging from her car. I called out to her and asked to help me. She agreed without reservation. Her name is Stacey.
I held the bird, holding his head and beak and she took the scissors I handed her and began to cut away the rope. It was quite a job and took some time. Soon we had the big piece off, but many small knots and fibers remained.
Fishing birds, like the Ahinga, have many small barbs or teeth on the ends of those long beaks. This enables them to hold the fish they catch so the fish cannot slip out of their beaks easily. The fibers of the rope were caught on these barbs making it quite difficult to finish the job easily. We wanted to be sure when we let him go that he was fully functioning again.
Interestingly, he stayed relatively still and quiet (except when I inadvertently let go of his beak and he pecked my face, ear and head) until the last fiber was removed. He knew when it was time to go. Stacey and I cheered in excitement when our rescue effort was successfully completed and he flew away, hopefully to enjoy his first meal in days. What a perfect moment! Stacey and I, complete strangers 30 minutes prior, hugged as only persons who have just accomplished a team effort, something meaningful will do.
WOW!
I am so blessed, I feel so prosperous because prosperity has little to do with money, and I feel so very connected to the Universe.
We are all connected to EVERYTHING.
But here he was again, still with that length of ‘something’ hanging from his beak. Now rather than try to scrape it off, he just sat there, burying his head under his wing. He’s starving, I thought to myself, becoming weaker and weaker. My heart was breaking but how could I help him. Maybe I could catch him?
I opened the door to my truck carefully, quietly…he didn’t move. I slipped off my outer flannel shirt…no response. I began approaching him over a distance of about 35 ft, expecting that at any moment he would startle and fly away. Amazingly, he didn’t. When I was about 3 feet from him I thought to myself ‘I’m going to do it.’ Two more steps and I threw my shirt over him and grabbed him! COOL !!! Except he immediately went for my eyes. I held his beak and examined the mess – and what a mess it was.
He did have rope, like clothesline line rope, wrapped and knotted completely around his beak. He was unable to open it enough to even get a drink of water. He would have perished for certain. But I had him now!
I immediately realized that this would be a two person job. I scanned the near empty parking lot until I found someone just emerging from her car. I called out to her and asked to help me. She agreed without reservation. Her name is Stacey.
I held the bird, holding his head and beak and she took the scissors I handed her and began to cut away the rope. It was quite a job and took some time. Soon we had the big piece off, but many small knots and fibers remained.
Fishing birds, like the Ahinga, have many small barbs or teeth on the ends of those long beaks. This enables them to hold the fish they catch so the fish cannot slip out of their beaks easily. The fibers of the rope were caught on these barbs making it quite difficult to finish the job easily. We wanted to be sure when we let him go that he was fully functioning again.
Interestingly, he stayed relatively still and quiet (except when I inadvertently let go of his beak and he pecked my face, ear and head) until the last fiber was removed. He knew when it was time to go. Stacey and I cheered in excitement when our rescue effort was successfully completed and he flew away, hopefully to enjoy his first meal in days. What a perfect moment! Stacey and I, complete strangers 30 minutes prior, hugged as only persons who have just accomplished a team effort, something meaningful will do.
WOW!
I am so blessed, I feel so prosperous because prosperity has little to do with money, and I feel so very connected to the Universe.
We are all connected to EVERYTHING.
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